02 December 2025
I can't with this doordash shit anymore. Trying to type that wasn't good with my keyboard. I'm less good at typing even though I'm filling out job applications these days. I've been listening to My Chemical Romance lately. It really feels the way I feel. The music speaks to me in ways that it shouldn't. I used to look down on emos and I still kinda do. MCR is better than any of that though. Look down is a strong word. I don't look down on emos. I just never really considered listening to the music much because I was into it in middle school. I'm lame. I feel sad about the way the world around me works. I drive a lot. And I love my girlfriend. That's what half these songs are about. At least some of them. The ones I like more. I wanna be nicer to people who aren't me. It's what I have to do if I want to get a job, I just don't like the kinds of people who interview me. I had to email a lady I found on facebook about a job. I'm an unemployed loser. My girlfriend is the best thing ever. I need her. I love her. I want to get a job so that I can get her into a better place than she is now. I know she'd be much happier at my house than anywhere else. Especially with her parents. Who take it upon themselves to insult her and force her to do stuff that she isn't able to do. They don't take autism seriously. But I do. That makes me better than them. There I go again. Looking down on people. Even though they're bigger than me. Everyone is. I'm a small kid in a trench coat who goes to the reigonal grocery store three days in a row because they don't have my pills. Kid who on one of those days begs for a job before being let down by the fact that they won't give her enough hours to survive. This place is tearing me apart. Every day I have to dust off my car due to the snow. It somehow snows every night.
The only good part about doordash is the flexibility it gives me regarding my girlfriend. I get to see her all the time because I can work with her in the car too. Any other job doesn't allow that. And other jobs might make me work on the only days I can see her. Which would suck. Everybody knows that. People don't take teenage romance seriously enough. I love that woman and I have to pay rent. I just wish the world would let me do both of those things at the same time. I'm crazy levels of gay for her. I want to kiss her everywhere right now. I wish I could drive away with her forever. I wish we could find a place together where we could live without worrying about rent, but then I'd be letting my roomate down. He can fend for himself better than I can though. I want a job that lets me live exactly how I live now. Just with money. Christmas is coming up and people won't be getting gifts from me. Holy shit this album just has star spangled banner in it. I'm listening to Danger Days by MCR. Something I've tried multiple times but not made it all the way through. I'm too lazy. Not too lazy to work though. If any of my supposed future employers are reading this. I need to work. Not doordash though.
On the topic of DoorDash I'm sick and tired of it. It makes you go into those stores and wait. You have to deal with scary customers. You get into multiple car accidents. I've changed this article from first second and third all throughout. I'm a bad writer. I'm washed. Doordash. Car dented. No tire. I could probably just journal about all this. Not post it on the internet. It's incredibly unlikely for anyone I know in real life to find this if I don't tell them about it. If I do tell people about it they probably just forget though. It's interesting. I have to put a little tracker on everyone who comes to this website. GUESS WHAT EVERYONE NEOCITIES IS AN IP GRABBER ITS AN IP GRABBER. I love when people tweet like that. They make up little jokes and dumb people get scared. All the QR codes are running out. Doordash made me yell at a taco bell employee once. It wasn't good. Their drink carriers are way too weak.
I watched some Drew Gooden videos and then a Kurtis Connor video today and I was blown away by how many sound effects Kurtis uses. It's silly. Mainly their videos about technology and capitalism and such. Stuff is lame now that wasn't lame earlier, but not in a fascist way. I wish I didn't have to see so many ads on the little box that shows me ads. I like when websites don't have a ton of ads. I used a strange method to get my phone to charge. Doordash isn't my job anymore so it doesn't matter that much. It does though because that's where my apps are. I'll delete this post soon. The people don't deserve to see it. I put too much of myself into it. Like weezer pinkerton. I guess I'm just inspired to bare all my real raw opinions on the internet because I listen to music that expresses real emotion. Early Sunsets Over Monroeville is the best song ever. I'd hate if I had to kill my girlfriend. It's relatable. It makes me cry. Sometimes while driving. I have a dumb tv so that it doesn't show me ads. I have a dumb car without a screen. I thought about getting a flip phone today, but then I wouldn't be able to doomscroll and I like doomscrolling. Also I don't have money. I love being an adult.